3:32PM – Yesterday after having a total of 13 I knew I had to start today with a good and fresh start. Till now after 2.5 hours of being awake, I have not had to smoke any cigarette whatsoever. There was a little urge which had come in, but since then has subsided.
I know this feeling very well. The mind (brain) will try to explain it to me, “See you’ve not smoked for more than 2 hours. You know how to control. So you can smoke 1. You already know the process, it should not be a problem if you smoke.”
That is exactly where the problem starts. You have 1 cigarette, by the time you are having the 2nd or the 3rd puff of the cigarette, the enjoyment of having it is already gone. As if you continue smoking the rest of the cigarette since you already paid for the full stick. You might as well complete having it.
I knew if I could have been in some sort of activity, I wouldn’t have had the urge to smoke. After waking up, when I saw all the electronic devices required to complete a 360 shoot, all of them had low battery, I knew I couldn’t go out to shoot anything. Have to stay home and control myself. That is my primary job today.